Breathe Me
by sherripolos
Summary: AU: Callie is a single mother with a young kindergarten Sofia, Sofia begins her first day of school only to introduce her mother to her new teacher: Miss Robbins. Serious scenarios occur, and the question of destiny, law and love occurs. Calzona fanfic, rated M for later chapters! Enjoy
1. Chapter 1

**HI GUYS IM BACK WITH A CALZONA STORY! I LOVE THIS COUPLE AND HAVE A FEW IDEAS IN MY HEAD THAT I WANT TO LET OUT!**

 **SO HERE IT GOES! PLEASE DONT FOGET TO FAVOURITE AND FOLLOW!**

Chapter 1

Glancing around her small, yet wonderful classroom, Arizona sighed her last de-stressed breath, admiring the decluttered classroom for one last time until the term would begin. Picking up her little box of goodies, she set off placing a small stationary set with cartoon animals on each of the knee high desks — everything was knee high, from chairs to sinks, to specially made toilets. Kindergarten just had its own set of everything! After the sixteen tables had been set, Arizona glanced through the register, placing mental bets on who was going to be the rascal of the class.

"10 more minutes!" Came the sing-songed voice of Miss Kepner, the other Kindergarten teacher, through her ajar door.

Arizona smiled, it was nice to be in a routine again, back to normality. All the children always told her stories of dreams they had had, whereby Miss Kepner had been Snow White and Arizona had been Cinderella; she had told April Kepner about this funny conversation, April had purely erupted into fits of giggles — telling each of their co-workers over and over again of the resemblance. They had all agreed with the child.

The bell rung and April, followed by Arizona stepped out on the gravelly play ground to collect their new classes. As the children lined up in snakey, obscure shaped lines, Arizona smiled as she saw all of them beam up at her in awe.

She slowly led into the classrooms and helped them find their pegs to hang their coats and sweaters. Arizona then took them into the classroom and announced they would all sit in a circle to play her original game: "Hello, my name is…". Arizona did this each year — nearly regimentally. After studying she knew she wanted to go straight into teaching, she wanted to help children have the most amazing childhoods they possibly could — unlike she did.

All sixteen of the tiny children sat down crossed leg in a more oval shape than circle. "So what we're going to do," She told them, "Is go around the circle and say our names, our favourite thing and what we want to be when we grow up! Okay?" Her voice became a lot softer when she spoke to children, more caring - less defensive. Looking around she could see each of their minds puzzling together what they were going to say.

"I'll go first," She said, getting comfortable, and looking around at the children with a reassuring look. "My name is Miss Robbins, my favourite thing is the beach and movies, and when I grow up I want to be a rockstar!" All the children giggled at her — their eyes glittering with admiration. "Okay kid, your turn…"

"My names Ellis, I love ice cream and I want to be a ballerina!"

After a good twenty minutes they finally got around to the last person, they had all come out with ambitious career paths and the true love for junk food. They had all laughed or smiled whenever Arizona had played class clown, or when one of the boys had made a mistake and ended up saying the wrong thing altogether; however the little girl sat to her left had not said a word, smiled, or even lifted her head. "Whats your name, sweetie?" She said, giving her a soft nudge.

The young girl sat there, staring into her lap, her chin resting flatly on her palm with her elbow placed on her knee.

"Sofia." The voice was more of a mumble and a whisper merged together, if Arizona had not looked over the register before they had got her she would have been convinced her name was Mia.

"Sofia!" She said still cheery; some of the other children were now staring — confused what was wrong. "So what things do you like Sofia?"

"I like it when my mummy is happy," her mouth was still firmly placed against her plan, yet her voice had become slightly more confident and legible. Arizona's brow furrowed at the response, however she did not act on her response — the last thing she wanted to do was to alienate her.

"I like it when people smile and are happy too," She said gazing at her dark brown, combed hair, as she looked up, lots of little angelic faces smiled at her; she chuckled to herself, already thinking to herself she definitely got the good class this year — unlike last year, whereby she had been dumped with the devils and April, secretly was overjoyed with her little delights. "How about, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

"Happy." The one word answer took Arizona by surprise, this young girl spoke like she had the world on her shoulders, Arizona's brows subconsciously furrowed again, meanwhile the young girl begun to look up.

The stare only lasted a few seconds, however, her small dark eyes gazed up at Arizona, she felt a wave of emotion traipse through her — Sofia's eyes were literally like the window to her soul. She was dressed smartly, her dark hair flowing smoothly down her back, and a pink-rose shade tinted each cheek.

Throughout the day Arizona watched the girl closely, not really wanting to lose sight of her. The children were having a ball, colouring, practising writing their names, chanting months, days, colours and numbers with Arizona. But Sofia was having none of it; she simply fiddled with the small rubber Arizona had given her in the set.

Different teachers popped in and out throughout the day, introducing themselves to the young entrepreneur wannabes. Each of the staff made their mark on the children, either with a joke or an accidental trip that led to floods of giggles. The day had been hectic, Arizona forgot how much teaching kindergarten took a toll on her — however the job was worth it. To see an array of happy faces smile at you in awe for ninety-nine point nine percent of the time, it was worth it. And she got paid too, which was a bonus!

Soon the home bell rung at three-thirty, disappointment spread over the children's faces; Arizona pulled out a sheet of stickers from her desk draw to congratulated them for no tears and completing a day at 'big school' — their spirits soon lifted. Helping each child get on their coats and making sure they each went home with the correct bag took some time, and before she knew it Arizona was running late. Mind you surely the parents must know — you cannot get anywhere on time when you have children — especially not sixteen!

Each of the children spotted their parents instantly and went running off to tell the tales of the first day — one of the mothers was even crying she was so thrilled having her daughter back. Arizona looked down and Sofia stood beside her, slowly taking her thumb out her mouth and turning to tell her: "Don't worry, she's always late."

Arizona crouched down, so she was the same height as the small girl. "Have you had a good day today?" She quietly asked. "You looked a bit upset, I hope you like having me as your teacher?!"

Sofia turned her subdued gaze to Arizona's concerned blue eyes, she reassuringly nodded at her. Then instantly she snapped her head up at the sound of stilettos on pavement only to shout: "Mummy!"

Arizona looked up to see a tall, striking, olive skinned woman. Her dress was immaculately fitted to her breath taking figure, sported by her formal posture and expensive jewellery. As she heard her daughter shout her, her face gleamed and her burgundy-red lips pulled back to give a huge smile down to her mini-self.

"Sofia!" She gasped smiling, hugging her tight. Her face glowed as she looked into Sofia's, now smiling, face. "Have you had a good day? How was it? Did you make any new friends? Is Ellis in your class? Is this your teacher?"

All her questions simply blew over Sofia's head who was, quite frankly, too overwhelmed to reply. However the last question had gained her attention.

"This is Miss Robbins!" She smiled tugging her mothers hand to welcome her to her new teacher. Arizona was taken a back. She had barely got a word out of her all day, now here she was being introduced to her mother like she had been teacher of the year or something!

"Hi, I'm Callie Torres, Sofia's mum," She offered her hand, to which Arizona shook in return. "Lovely to meet you, I'm sure Sofia's got lots of exciting stories to tell me about today!"

Sofia and Arizona both gave an uneasy smile, to which Callie guessed there was something wrong.

"Ms Torres," Arizona cleared her throat before she continued. "Do you have a minute?"

Callie looked from Arizona, to her daughter, then back to Arizona. Arizona could tell that she's been in similar situations before — the brief roll of Callie's magnetic eyes suggested she already knew what was going to be said, but still, she followed the blond back to the classroom. Leaving Sofia outside to play on the equipment provided for the school by the former pupils of a rich family, Arizona and Callie watched as she played along with her imagination, talking to the small rubber as if it were a walkie-talkie.

Subconsciously Arizona's leg was violently shaking underneath the table; it was a childhood habit, something that everyone had said she'd grow out of. However she hadn't, and she'd experience many first dates when her company was no more than impressed of her lack of disguise towards her feelings, and ended up leaving the date early.

"Is everything all right Miss Robbins?" Callie asked looking at the blonds' shaking leg in concern.

"Oh, sorry," Arizona reacted, placing the palm of her hand against her leg to try and prevent the rattling. "Everything's okay thank you. Well, I know its the start of term, well the first day in fact. However Sofia has been extremely subdued — and to put it quite frankly: deep. I've seen this before as I've had a child prodigy in my previous class; a young girl who could only express herself with her love of classical music. However this situation is a bit different; I offered numerous activities to Sofia, yet she was having none of it. Is there anything I should be aware about? Or anything that is a sensitive subject with her? I know its the first day, but in my class, the children are my main priority, and of course their happiness is a huge influence on their capability of learning. Im not saying your child isn't happy, I just want to make school a happy place for her too."

Arizona's small speech left Callie quite taken a back, nobody except herself, had ever talked about Sofia with such passion or understanding. She let out a sigh as she continued watching Sofia swing on the worn ropes of the obstacle course; turning back to Arizona her eyes glistened in affection of her child.

"Sofia is a little me," She smiled, slightly blushing of her admittance to her inner ego. "She reminds me of me when I was younger, or in fact me now. I like to keep myself to myself. I don't see it in a bad way, however recently she's become consumed with fantasy novels. Her imagination used to be manageable — however its grown considerable amounts." She stopped for a few seconds as her eyes watered. "Sofia's dad died last year. We weren't together, Sofia used to go and see him every other weekend. But she loved going to see her, he connected with her in a way I will never be able to; I try, I really do. I'm struggling, I really am. But what's done is done, I'm all he's got now. I need to pull myself together."

Arizona watched the woman as she pulled out a pack of small delicate tissues with her manicured hands. Callie had been open, yet private with her; Arizona respected that. She had told Arizona useful information about her child's situation without turning it into a sob story, Callie had a strong exterior — Arizona could see that.

"I respect you," came Arizona's unexpected reply. Callie dabbed her eye and smiled. "Not many people would tell me that about their child on the first day, but you did. Its good; and I can assure you — Sofia will be just fine with me. It's surprising how much better the kids can cope with these situations more than the adults."

The women let out a small chuckle, both watching Sofia intently, as if she were performing a show. Callie had asked about the syllabus for the term, asking what she could do to support Sofia at home; Arizona had flicked through her booklet, explaining the techniques she used to help drill in the information. She had learnt that Callie was a hands on mom, someone who strived to make themselves and the people around them the best they could be. Arizona liked that, and she carried on explaining until the janitor came to say lights out.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

The first few weeks passed quicker than Arizona could have imagined; each night she drove her self home to her isolated flat and almost collapsed from exhaustion. Her marking piles had increased to the height of her friend, Miranda, who had attempted to get the young blonde to stop working and go and enjoy herself — yet she had evidently not succeeded as Arizona had sat sunken in her sofa each night.

All the children had begun to emerge from their positive exterior, to make Arizona question herself again as to whether she had received the angels or devils; her and April continued to work as a team and were now planning for the Christmas nativity. Arizona was a very festive person, its how she'd been brought up, however her family had stopped celebrating Christmas when her brother, Timothy, suddenly got shot dead in war. She didn't see much of her parents anymore, she had moved from Maine to Seattle as she had always dreamed of living in Washington. She saw it as an educational wonderland, we're she could succeed and use her teaching skills to the best of her capabilities. So at Christmas, she celebrated her love for the festivity with the children; making cakes, singing songs, drawing cards, and overall having a good time.

April and Arizona had been sat for hours deciding upon the roles for the nativity; confident and cheeky little Ellis Shepherd had got Mary, Tuck had been chose to play Joseph because of his projective voice… more and more roles were given out. Then a shy name had come up.

"What part should we give Sofia?" April asked Arizona tentatively. "Maybe just an animal so she doesn't have to do much talking?"

"I think we should put her as the angel," Arizona smiled back, "We haven't got that role sorted and I think Sofia would just melt the audiences hearts, I mean she literally IS a little angel!"

So for the rest of the day Arizona and April sat placing the letter announcing the child's part and addressing it to the parents. They placed each one in the children's' worn rucksacks and begun to wait for the amount of questions and demands from the eager parents.

…

Closing the door behind her Callie let out a sigh of relief. The surgery was a complicated one and the outcome had been a close shave with the inevitable. A wave of exhaustion poured over her as she scrubbed out and removed herself into the more breezy corridor.

"You did good in there Torres," Derek, the neurosurgeons voice came from behind her. "Fixing a spinal fracture that severe with no paralysis — thats rare. Walk tall Torres, be proud."

Callie smiled while thanking her friend, he had been there when Mark had not. It was the kind of friendship that you only ever get one of, and as an added bonus, he was amazing with Sofia. Derek and Meredith had had their ups and downs, but right now they were doing great, Callie used their example as inspiration for her own love life — however she was dramatically failing. It wasn't because she wasn't out, oh she was out, bisexual and proud, it was just she couldn't find someone with the full package; someone who understood her and her work commitments, and the deal breaker — someone who could have a good loving relationship with Sofia. She had had many dates, maybe a few too many, however the moment she mentioned she had a daughter all hopes of romance, love and affection had just blown out of the window.

Callie waltzed into the attending lounge, delighted by the fact that the treacherous day was nearly over, she took off her lab coat and placed it neatly in her locker. Taking her bag of casual clothes she walked into the toilet before locking the door, Callie looked deeply into the mirror. Her face had altered slightly, not with age, but experiences and maturity; she looked like a strong woman — not that she didn't before, however now you could see this grit in her eyes, the challenges she had faced by her pouty lips. Slowly getting dressed she stalled until the clock hit 4pm ready for her to go and pick up her darling from school.

Driving along she felt her eyes drooping with tiredness, she had been on nightshifts all week and Sofia had had the flu and had to stay off school. Pulling up to the school park she was greeted with complete chaos of cars, all driving at a ridiculously slow speed — she might as well of walked. Meredith stood patiently waiting for her beside the wooden school gate, tapping her foot and occasionally glancing at her pager. Callie and Meredith had fallen pregnant at around about the same time, Meredith already had two older children, yet her only other mom-friend was Callie. They valued their relationship together, often helping each other out, babysitting or fetching, and even having sweet playdates with the girls.

As they walked slowly to the pick up area Callie saw Sofia's face light up the minute she saw her. She saw Sofia tug at her teachers dress and point over-excitedly towards Callie as she did everyday; with a quick look up at Callie and a nod Miss Robbins dismissed her and Sofia charged towards Callie. Callie lifted and twirled round with her small, young daughter, placing a soft kiss on her forehead. Sofia's face lit up as she passed Callie the oh so exciting letter confirming her role in the small play.

"Open it, mummy! Open it!" Sofia was basically shoving it in Callie's face by this point, so excited and eager to find out what Miss Robbins had chosen her to be.

Callie slowly opened the letter teasing Sofia, who was growing more and more impatient by the second. She scanned over the page, and beamed when she saw the bold writing.

 **Sofia Torres - Guardian Angel/Angel Gabriel**

"Oh sweetie!" She gasped, proud of her little girl. "You're gonna be an angel!"

Sofia looked up, slightly confused. "Like Daddy?"

"Like Daddy." Callie agreed.

Callie looked across the playground to see Miss Robbins looking over in her direction, Miss Robbins' face was concerned as to whether she had made the correct decision and whether both Callie and Sofia were happy with it. Callie nodded with gratitude to the woman, who gave a smile back and continued to dismiss the other children. Callie begun to walk over, not knowing what she was doing dragging along Sofia with her.

As she approached Miss Robbins, alarm bells begun to go off in her head… Why was she doing this? What was she even going to say? She just purely wanted to talk to the woman, the reason unbeknown to her.

"Hi Ms Torres," Arizona smiled, still busily dismissing the children. "Is, er, everything okay?"

"Hi — yes, er, everything is great." Callie replied smiling. She became almost giddy with excitement when she looked at the blonde, she had no idea why — she barely knew the woman.

"Can I help you with anything then?" Came her sweet yet slightly awkward-toned reply. She stared at Callie, brows slightly furrowed, curious as to what the woman intentions of this conversation were.

Callie could feel the awkward tension rising, she felt her cheeks flush a violent shade of red. "I just wanted to thank you for Sofia's part, she's delighted and so am I."

Arizona gave a warm smile to Callie then down to Sofia; she then crouched down until she was kindergarten height and squeezed Sofia's shoulder. "Well, I guess me and Miss Kepner couldn't resist! She is a little angel isn't she?!"

Callie smiled down at Sofia who was in pure awe of her teacher. "You should see her at home — not so angelic then!"

Sofia made a devious face at Callie. "Hey!" She said playfully, knowing that Callie was teasing her. "See you tomorrow Miss Robbins." Sofia begun to wave at the woman who was standing less than a meter away from her and Callie took that as her cue to leave.

She bit her lip slowly and subconsciously before saying her farewell to the woman. Meredith had been watching this strange interaction from Callie, who never made conversations with anyone for the sake of just talking — ever. She walked over with Ellis to join Callie and Sofia who were now exiting the playground, Callie gave daggers in her direction knowing she was going to get slaughtered by her best friend.

"Calliope Iphigenia Torres, what was that?!" Meredith shrieked, giggly and giving Callie a playful nudge.

"Sh! Please." Callie said warning the woman to keep her voice down. "It was nothing — okay? I just wanted to thank her for putting Sofia as the guardian angel!"

"Well, Kepner put Ellis as Mary and you don't see me going over to literally kiss her ass and going a, may I add, horrific shade of red!"

"I'm not a people person, you know that." Callie pleaded, praying for her dignity back.

"And apparently not a heterosexual person either."

Callie frowned at Meredith while quickly covering Sofia's ears. Sofia turned around towards Callie and Meredith.

"Auntie Mer, whats a henerosensual?" Her lips pouted and eyebrows raised as she asked her aunt curiously.

"That's something you learn about when you're older Sof." Callie answered while giving Meredith a death stare. "Thanks a lot."

As Callie lay in bed that night thoughts spiral tangentially around her head. Her mind could not stop thinking about this teacher. Callie looked forward everyday to pick up Sofia at school, but she also looked forward to seeing the woman. She kept creating meaningless excuses to go and speak to her, whether it was confirmation of a school trip that she already knew was definitely happening or asking what the homework was when it was already out on the table at home completed.

She curled herself up in her empty king-sized bed, her stomach sick with nerves for the surgery tomorrow — or at least, thats what she thought they were for. She has been so glued together with work and Sofia that she didn't feel her life was incomplete at all, or that anything was missing. However, it was on nights like these when she realised how lonely she was, and in particular, how much she craved an adult relationship. Not just any relationship, she wanted a family; someone else who would also parent with her, who could support her, Sofia and her career. Was it too much to ask?

After an hour or so of contemplating her options Callie was suffering, so she got up, slipped on a nightshirt over her underwear and tiptoed into Sofia's room. She looked over, her dark brown hair spread nonchalantly over her tired, dreaming face; she looked content, happy, at peace with the world. Callie scurried over to the other side of the bed and climbed in behind her, placing her arm over the sleeping child and inhaling the scent of her hair. If this wasn't home, who knew what was?

The next morning Sofia rolled over to find Callie sleeping at last behind her. With her tiny hands she pinched her mums nose causing her mum to snort and wake herself up. Sofia burst into fits of giggles, she loved her mum so much, they were always making each other laugh.

"Mummy," She asked playfully. "Why are you in my bed?"

"Oh shoot! Is it morning already?" Callie looked at the clock, they were an hour late for school. "Im sorry baby, I had a sleep over. I couldn't sleep — you helped me though."

"Why couldn't you sleep mummy?"

"Why do you ask so many questions Sofia?" Sofia's face dropped at Callies unappreciated sarcasm. "Okay, okay. I had a lot of thoughts in my head"

"What were you thinking of mummy?"

"Sofia, we're late. Can we talk about this another time?"

"Were you thinking about Miss Robbins?" She asked innocently. "Because I think about Miss Robbins when I'm upset and she makes me happy again! She's really funny, I like her a lot."

"Yes," Callie gave in, trying to be as smooth as possible; unbeknown to Sofia's now-confident relationship with Miss Robbins. "I was thinking about her too."

The next half an hour was hectic, from brushing teeth to Sofia whining as Callie tried to comb her tangled hair. As they left the house to get into their little black car they looked like pinky and perky, worn out, stressed and like they'd been pulled through a hedge backwards. Callie accidentally drove through three red lights in attempted of decreasing their lateness, to which Sofia was convinced that her mum was going to be hunted down by the CIA for 'seriously breaking the law'.

They pulled up on the car-parking lot and ran from the reception, where they continued on for the kindergarten classroom. It turned out the class was already playing out for their first recess of the day, Callie glanced at her watch, 11 o'clock. Shit.

Callie, like a nervous school girl, knocked on the door of Miss Robbins classroom. "Come in!" Came the reply from inside the room.

Miss Robbins looked from Sofia, to Callie, to the clock, then back again to the nervous pair.

"I thought you weren't going to be coming in today Sofia!" She said. "Is everything okay?"

"We over slept Miss Robbins," Sofia told her, with her highest sense of maturity. "Mummy had a sleepover, because she couldn't sleep."

Miss Robbins smiled at Sofia. "It's okay sweetie!" She said kindly, before softly adding: "But let's try and not make it happen too many times again!"

Sofia nodded with sincerity, before turning back to her mum in dismissal. "You can go now mummy."

"Okay sweetie, well I guess I'll see you in a few hours!" Callie looked up from Sofia to Miss Robbins. "I'm so sorry, it wont happen again. I guess I just had a rough night."

"Yes! She was thinking about you!" Sofia shouted and laughed.

Callie's eyes closed. She should have seen that coming, never tell kids something that shouldn't be shared — ever. She wished the ground would open up and swallow her whole.

"Thinking about me?" Miss Robbins said, slyly grinning at Callie raising her one eyebrow. "Well, that would be rough wouldn't it."

Sofia was oblivious to the comments made, but was confused as to why her mother had gone the same hue as when she last spoke to Miss Robbins. She was also confused as to why Callie had suddenly rushed off. So when Arizona took her hand and helped her get sorted for the day, she did just that.


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm so sorry how long its taken to upload! So a quick nice chapter to get you back into the spirit,**

 **I don't want to rush the connection, so yes hope you enjoy and please review, favourite and follow :)**

Sofia galloped around the room shrieking and laughing as she poured glitter and tinsel over Callie. Today was the day of the nativity — something that the Torres household had been counting down to since October. Callie and Meredith had spent a surgery-free afternoon hiding from the Chief in the attendings' lounge putting together outfits for both Ellis and Sofia. Most of Ellis' costume was made out of old scrubs as the blue and white combination was still mandatory, yet Sofia's had been a bit harder to make. However here she was, smiling adorably as Callie took a picture with her camera; another one to stick on the fridge.

Getting Sofia to school today was no problem, she even brushed her teeth independently, which Callie eventually had to redo — much to Sofia's disappointment. Arriving at school the kindergarten classroom was chaos, Miss Robbins looked helplessly around at the withering children. However, whenever she tried to speak, her quiet, soft voice was overridden by whining, complaining or singing children.

"Hey kids!" Callie shouted, completely mortifying Sofia. All the children turned to face her, confused by the new voice. "Hows about we're a little bit quieter and help Miss Robbins out?"

All the children nodded and turned the volume down until the room was almost silent. Miss Robbins looked up, her eyes full of awe and thankfulness for Callie's brief, yet practical input. Callie smiled and bent down to kiss Sofia on the head.

"Goodbye baby," She said softly. "Good luck my little angel, I'll be as quick as I can in the OR today okay? But remember what mummy always says, I save lives…"

"… you save families." Sofia finished for her. Growing up had been hard for Sofia, losing her father at a young age and having a mother with a full-time, unpredictable job. She learnt to adjust, she understood that if her mum couldn't make it to something there were either severe complications or dire circumstances. She had drilled it into Sofia the role of her work, she taught Sofia the brutal honesty of life and death, that dead meant dead, that coming back after death was impossible. She didn't do this to scare her small child, she just learnt the hard way that wrapping her up in cotton-wool was pointless; life was unpredictable, and when someone close has passed, its hard to explain the severity of death. Callie smiled down to her little old lady, Sofia was so old for her time, yet she was a little madam at the same time, never failing to pull out her five-going-on-fifteen attitude.

"Good luck boys and girls!" Callie waved before giving one last look over to Miss Robbins. "Are you going to be okay?"

Miss Robbins blushed, no one had asked her that in a long time. It was obvious Callie didn't mean it in the way she craved it to be said to her, yet still the simple phrase made her feel warm and fuzzy — it may have been the phrase, it may have been the woman, yet Miss Robbins kept her tall walls up and thanked the woman softly. Calle dismissed herself from the classroom, smiling down the artwork wallpapered corridors; as she walked down she kept her eyes peeled for Sofia's name, however she was too dazed to realise she'd walked straight passed seven of her pieces.

Our in the parking lot she took in a deep breath, appreciating the lack of humidity in the air. She felt different, dizzy or giddy. Her hypochondriasis behaviour kicked in, convincing herself she was suffering with a brain tumour, then her non-hypochondriasis, professional, Harper Avery Award winning surgeon side of her came out. No, she did not have a brain tumour; she had a crush.

….

Arizona stood by the side of the stage, directing the children when to go on and off the stage. Currently the children were singing their hearts out to a dark room full of parents and video cameras, who were patiently waiting for their children to have their sweet line, which probably would occur on more horrifying sweet-sixteenth videos than one could imagine.

She looked out into the audience, seeing who had made it. Jim Butler, a rather obese man, who continuously flirted with Arizona, despite her rumoured sexuality, was sat on the first front row seat. Crunching loudly on an oversized, share pack of Doritos, Arizona had already asked him once whether he could delay eating them for half and hour, but she was cut short by his argument that it was 'Human Rights' to be able to eat. She saw a group of pushy mothers, sat in a small gaggle each one nudging the others when their pride and joy yearned to the stage, claiming it took them hours to construct the outfit; Arizona had seen the same outfits years on end — they were obviously store-bought.

Arizona was subconsciously looking for someone in the audience, her eyes scanning over and over for the all to familiar head of long black hair. However much to her dismay Ms, or should she say Doctor, Torres was not in the crowd.

The small group of singers came off the stage after singing the final carol and were ready to perform the finale, which consisted of bows and a song. Sofia trudged along at the back of the line, looking at the floor.

"Whats the matter sweetie?" Arizona bent down and asked.

"My Momma's not here." Her eyes pleaded for reassurance that her mother was out there somewhere; however as Arizona had been looking for the past half hour for her, she was more than certain that Callie's presence was not here.

"She'll be here soon, remember she's probably just saving lives — like she does!" Arizona smiled as she tried to repeat Callies routine of drilling in the legitimate reason why she wasn't there. But when Arizona looked into her eyes she could see no matter what she said — she only wanted her mother.

"So Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you for all attending and I hope you enjoyed Kindergartens performance of the nativity! They have all worked extremely hard and I think they all deserve a round of applause." Arizona stood at the front of the stage talking into the microphone, each parent staring at her waiting for her speech to finish so they could get off to their own lives. "The children should be proud of themselves, and thank you for all your cooperation providing outfits and packed teas! They will be ready to collect from their form rooms if you give them ten minutes to change." The rustling started as people started to gather their things, followed by another round of applause and the sound of fifty sets of shoes begin to stand up and head for the exit.

Arizona sighed as she finally sat in her chair, her body ached and her head hurt; but it was worth it. Only Sofia was left standing by the window using her thumb as a pacifier, slowly rubbing her nose with her index finger to calm herself.

"We did it my darling! Now — wheres the vodka?" April popped round the corner of the door, suddenly gasping and stopping herself mid-sentence when she noticed that not all the children had been dismissed. She glanced down at her watch, ten past six it read, two hours later than pickup time. "Oh sorry Sofia; I didn't realise you were still here. Arizona, am I okay to get off? Or do you want me to stay here?"

Arizona summed up the options in her head and eventually decided that April might as well go. She would only be keeping her company and Arizona was not selfish enough to plea for April to stay and miss out on her newly engaged life.

"No its fine." She said, glancing over at Sofia and opening her arms out like a bear, before giggling: "You go and enjoy Jackson"

Sofia came over and crawled onto Arizona's knee placing her head on her shoulder, while been wrapped tight with Arizona's motherly embrace. Arizona looked back up to April, her eyes full of warmth and care; April could see the love she had for the small girl. Arizona had never been one for favourites, but to April, it was obvious the she had a deeper connection to the child.

"Okay then, I'm off! See you both tomorrow!" April sung, no matter what time of day it was, whether she was in work or not, she was always so perky and happy. Sometimes it was more annoying than good; but she was a kindergarten teacher, surely no-one expected any different.

It was just Sofia and Arizona left in the room, Arizona had offered a range of activities: colouring, a book or even painting, but Sofia just snuggled deeper into the crook of her neck. Arizona stood up and sat the small child on her hip taking her over to the 'cosy corner'; she picked out a film, Mary Poppins, one of her childhood favourites and sat on the beanbag.

As the film continued Sofia had fell asleep on her chest. It was half past eight, obviously past her bedtime and she'd given in fighting away the tiredness. The credits begun to roll up the screen and Arizona was officially stuck under the child; she simply paused the screen and stared out the window into the wintery night. The quietness and serenity calmed her, and the heavy breathing of the child soothed her, making her feel drowsy herself. Her eyes kept drooping shut, her body relaxing more and more by the second, until she heard a knock at the door.

Arizona looked up, startled by the sudden noise, quickly re-awakening herself, to find Dr Torres in the door way, smiling with adoration down at the sleep woman with and even more sleepy child sprawled over her.

She continued to walk in, lightly stepping in attempt to not wake her child in her challenging stilettos. She made it to the cosy corner and sat on a small bean bag opposite Arizona, placing her bag off her shoulder and alongside her undersized seat.

She begun to tear up. "I'm so sorry."

Arizona leant forward and placed her hand softly on her knee, softly smoothing her hand over her shaking body. "It's okay, Dr Torres, it's okay."

Callie looked up at the consoling woman. "Please," she begun. "Call me Callie."


	4. Chapter 4

**_A/N Hey! So sorry this has took me so long to update! I've been super busy all summer with exams, going to volunteer in Africa and starting college etc! I hope to start getting this story going now as I've finally decided what going to happen! Thank you for the incredible responses Ive received._**

 ** _Also sorry for typos in previous chapters - I seriously need to get into the habit of checking my work._**

 ** _Anyways its late and I'm tired - I hope you enjoy!_**

 ** _Please favourite/follow share etc!_**

 ** _Much love x_**

CHAPTER 4

Callie had sat for what felt like hours on the bean bag talking, as well as quietly crying. She had told and retold Arizona of the surgery revising and reenacting each incision and suture, trying each time to decipher the fault; the fault which cost a man his life.

Arizona watched her delicate hands moving backwards and forwards over the imaginary patient, concentrating on the way her nails grew only ever so slightly over the tips of her fingers. The long bones which firmly held the non existent scalpel, graceful and elegant, perfectly smooth, with only a small scar below her knuckle. Her ring finger was bare, not even a small tan line, showing signs of yearning for the right one. Arizona look down at Sofia, her small hand clasping the strap of Arizonas top, similar to her mothers - just scar-free.

All of what Callie told Arizona simply went over the blondes head, however she listened intently and gave a reassuring nod ever so often. Arizona found it mesmerising how much passion the woman had with her job, hoping God forbid one day if she were a patient at Seattle Grace, that she'd have a doctor like Callie. Called eyes fired passion and strength, yet emotionally worried about the consequences of her incorrect actions, while Arizona's sea-blue eyes glistened awe and a caring streak towards the woman.

"I don't understand how this has happened. It's a simple surgery, I do it all the time." Callie wept quietly, emotionally drained from the insanity of performing her imaginary surgery over and over again.

She felt a warm hand circle over her knee giving her goosebumps from the warmth and severity; she looked up at the blond having barely made any sort of connection since she'd been playing god. She saw the sympathy the woman held for her in her eyes, the blue looking like a stream in a summers day; Callie pulled back her deep red lips and smiled, revealing her perfectly set white teeth and small creases on her cheeks. Her heart warmed and calmed almost instantly, she then looked down at her sleeping child, snuggle cosily into Arizona's chest, her lips faintly mumbling her rehearses song lines, her eyes occasionally opening slightly to show the dreaming girl oblivious to the world. As Callie looked back up towards the woman she could see Arizona had notice the affection she had shown Sofia, and herself.

"Callie," Arizona begun. "It was an accident. I know it's not an everyday accident but something went wrong that shouldn't have. A man died, yes it's horrible, but it's irreversible. Repeating over and over again what you've done won't bring him back, but only reassure you more it was your fault. Sofia needs you, why not wait until tomorrow, when you're fresh minded and have been able to sleep. You look exhausted — you both do."

Arizona looked down at Sofia, using her hand to smooth over the tops of the small girls dark hair. She then brushed her own hair behind her eyes, a childhood nervous habit, before looking back up at the brunette again.

"I went and got my phone afterwards, I went and got my phone -" Callie was quietly laughing, as if someone had said a funny joke. Arizona looked at her, unsure how such a simple statement would be so hilarious. The confusion of her face caused the woman to continue. "I got my freaking phone to call Mark, to tell him about it, to ask him what I should do, to ask him to fetch Sofia. Mark, he always knew what to do, or what to say to cheer me up. And then I remembered he's gone. Dead. My Mark is dead and I needed to call him."

Sofia fidgeted in Arizona's arms, changing her position, getting comfortable, leaving Arizona the uncomfortable one.

"And it was only then that I realised - I have no one. I have no one besides a kid who doesn't know her left from her right. I'm alone; Calliope Iphegenia Torres, alone. God. At high school, college, university, even my internship I was always out there, never alone. Now look at me. The love of my life is dead and I'm here weeping like a mad woman."

"Calliope, please." Calliope rolled of Arizona's tongue as if it were a normal part of her everyday vocabulary. No one called Callie 'Calliope' except her father, she despised the name; however, as Arizona spoke it, a warm sensation burned through her body. "You're not alone, you have Sofia, you have your friends — I see your very close with Dr Grey and Dr Shepherd, surely that counts for something."

Callie sighed, her eyes giving away what she really yearned for. "I don't mean like that though, yes they are incredible friends, but I need more. I need sex. I need to feel alive."

Arizona blushed violently. After days on end being spent with kindergarten she rarely heard the mention of such actions, especially using the correct words. April and her would use alternative innocent words when they spoke about sex; not that they did that much. However, Callie seemed almost at ease talking about it, it's probably the doctor, anatomical-interested side of her coming out.

Arizona looked down to check the status of Sofia, after confirming to herself that the child was still fast asleep Arizona continued.

"When you're not upset, when you're over… being upset…. there will be people lining up for you." The hesitation in her voice lingered for the first half, then ease plummeted through her veins and Arizona blurted out the rest.

Callie at first was puzzled by what Arizona was making out, but by the last half of the sentence and the violent shade of ruby her cheeks turned, it was evident of the woman's intentions.

Callie softly smiled at the woman, leaning over to rub Sofia's back. Her hand accidentally traipsed briefly along Arizona's thigh, Callie felt as if sparks were flying from her fingertips and she saw a wave of goosebumps appear over Arizona's skin. The tension between the women began to rise, Callie noticed herself getting more and more nervous by the minute; forgetting everything about the surgery and the problem she was going to face at work tomorrow; all she could focus on was the woman in front of her.

"I think I'd better go, it's passed midnight, I'm sorry for keeping you up all this time, you've probably got so much work to do. No, forget that. You've probably got an entire family waiting for you to come home!" Callie leaned over the woman to pick up the sleeping child, reluctant to wake her above and disturb her angelic sleep.

"I don't have anyone either. No man, no woman." Her voice lowered to almost a quiver. "No children."

"Arizona— wait. Am I okay calling you that?" Arizona slightly nodded, taken aback by how natural the name came to her. "I think you'll make a brilliant mother; I mean look at you."

Callie gestured towards Arizona's lap where Sofia slept peacefully, Arizona's eyes glistened. With not much space between the women, they could almost hear the racing of each others hearts. As Callie leaned in further to scoop the child off her lap, Arizona tilted her head upwards and placed a soft, yearning kiss on her closed lips.

The feel of the other woman lips tore through Callie's veins like adrenaline. Her head turned into a jungle, a chaotic jungle. Words, conversations, looks, all swirling around her head at what felt like a hundred miles an hour. Every feel of isolation and loneliness simply disappeared into a memory, fantasy merged with reality, questions filled her head, yearning for answers, unexplainable to Callie.

Arizona felt queasy, a nervous nausea of dread of betrayal lay quivering in her stomach. What had she done? Did this cross the line? Her body felt alive, woman, human. She hadn't felt like this in years; she felt like a lovestruck fresher, giggly, excited — the unknowingness exhilarated her. Slowly pulling away she released the child into Callie's grasp and together they slowly stood up.

Callie was in shock, Arizona could tell. She had kissed enough 'straight' girls in her time to know when someone was questioning every decision on their sexuality they had ever made. Arizona loved it, she almost felt dominant of Callie's fate.

Slowly they walked to the decorated door of her classroom, neither one of them wanting to face reality or put an end to this night. Oh so many questions ran through Callie's naive mind; both for Arizona and herself.

As they reached the door, Arizona noticed Callie fumble around in her pocket. She turned around to face Arizona before leaving; taking in the look of absentmindedness and innocence that gleamed in her eyes like a child. Her smooth, glowing skin, raised on her cheeks, outlining her facial features. Her soft pouty lips, with small creases ingrained either side, giving her a constant kind smile; everything that made Arizona herself Callie tried to acknowledge — trying to take it all in.

She passed Arizona a small slip of crumpled paper and pressed it into the palm of her hand, holding it there for a second longer than anybody who's relationship had platonic feelings would. She placed a soft kiss on her cheek, placing her cheek on Arizona's, feeling the heat of her skin. As she pulled away, Callie looked into the other woman's eyes before saying: "We should do this again."

As she turned and left Arizona couldn't quite function what had happened. She still felt heat upon her skin where Callie had planted the kiss, and already missed the butterfly sensation she felt in her stomach.

Looking down and unfolding the crumpled paper, she saw a series of digits sprawled out, with a simple '-C x' to end. Arizona smiled down at the paper and tucked it safely into the back pocket of her trousers.

Gathering her things together she made her way out of classroom; taking a last look round the empty classroom for the night, she tried to comprehend in her head the series of events that had occurred. She had crossed the line, she knew.

But Calliope Torres — that woman was worth it.


End file.
